The Secret Handshake

One day, very early in my pregnancy, I received a small package in the mail. Delighted to see something other than a bill or one of my husband's sailing magazines, I quickly tore it open. A flat bundle of tissue paper emerged, and in it was a delicately painted bit of metal in the shape of an expectant woman. "To the world you may be just one person. But to one person you may be the world," decorated the woman's flowing skirt. I reached into the envelope again, and this time withdrew a card. In it, my friend explained that she had received this same gift during her first pregnancy. She had decided to pass it along to me, to welcome me to the "motherhood" as she called it. It was as if she had taught me a secret handshake, and in doing so invited me into an inner circle that would continue to be a source of strength and inspiration throughout the following months.

What may seem like a small gesture to some has become a reminder to me of the graciousness, generosity, and compassion of my friends. The friend that sent this to me had been trying to get pregnant for several months, something I was completely unaware of when I first shared my news with her. Despite her own struggles, her response to my pregnancy was selfless; she rejoiced for and with me. And since then, she has continued to be my advocate . She is just one example of the numerous women in my life whose qualities I try to emulate (often with only moderate success!)

I don't think my fellow members of the motherhood realize all that they've done for me or what I anticipate they will do for me after my life officially changes forever with the birth of my first child. Or maybe they do, and that is why it is such a powerful yet unspoken alliance amongst women. On days such as today, when I find myself in the quiet of the early morning, or late in the sleepless nights, when I face all my fears about being a mother, a wife, a professional, and a friend, I ultimately find solice as I reflect on all that the women in my life have accomplished in these very same roles. To my mother, my sister, my dearest Tucson friends (with and without children)... to ALL of you, thank you.